Quotable Quotes that Deserve to be Shared

Actually, most of these are a follow on to the fabulous compliments section....

J was told to write about the most memorable part of his school year:
A memory of mine is when my class and another class and I went to Sun and Sand...then when I go into the bathroom there's a picture of elvis and when I walk by it it and it looks like his eyes are following you.
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Teacher: Look D----, a square and a rectangle are like you and your dad. Like you and your dad are both from the "Jones" family. So (while drawing a square) here's your dad, E. Jones and here's you (drawing a rectangle). I can call either of you Mr. Jones, but I can't call you E, only your dad.

Student D----: Are you saying my dad is a square?
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M asks, "Is Rebecca really 108?" and hears, "No, she's 51."
He responds, "Oh! That makes more sense."
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From a parent, as I tried to explain a note I'd sent home that day and apologized that she considered the writing on the note sloppy,
"Well, see there - you're certainly not perfect!"
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From another parent, after he'd called in the evening and spent almost 45 minutes telling me how terrible a teacher I was for his child, "I hope there's no hard feelings or anything. I don't want you to be upset."
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And in my summer pursuits, J tries to comfort me concerning some of my lacking skills in the cowboy world. "You're not that bad at heading. You just can't catch and you don't know how to handle. That's all heading is, catches and handles."